How to pray for the Toxic people in your life.
Love gives. Loves goes the extra mile. Love endures.
That love is not always reciprocated.
As Christ followers, we strive to give love from a pure heart that doesn’t require a person to love us perfectly in return. We intentionally allow God to be our source of perfect love, and we relinquish the right to demand it from others. In obedience to God and His Word, we set our hearts on being patient and kind. We commit to modeling Jesus’ sacrificial love. But sometimes the person we give our love to consistently betrays and wounds us. How do we give I Corinthians 13 love in that situation?
Debbie McDaniel wisely suggests we set boundaries and limit the control an unhealthy person might be placing on our life. She also notes when “we look deep into the mirror of our souls, we may realize that we are the ones who have some unhealthy tendencies that God wants to change.”
I’ve got a really strong mercy streak. For decades, I’ve looked for the best in everyone. I pursued relationships with very emotionally unhealthy people. I was sure God loved them and I could, too, but I had no idea how to employ boundaries. I gave love no matter how much pain was delivered to me in return. I was too timid to speak the truth in love.
I lived with a desperate fear of confrontation. My rational thinking dropped into a coma if I sensed any threat of an explosive reaction. Eventually resentment wrestled mercy to the ground. Wounded and exhausted, I would just walk away from the relationship.
Pride kept me from seeing these things about myself. It also kept me focused on how the “other person” needed to change so I could be ok. With amazing grace, God revealed the truth for the purpose of restoring me to wholeness.
He sent His Word and healed me and delivered me from self-destruction. Psalm 107:20
God offers healing and freedom to everyone.
He is waiting to transform the lives of everyone leaking nuclear emotions and throwing verbal grenades. The controller, the abuser, and the too-easily angered are not immune to the power of God’s Word. We are promised that nothing is impossible with God (Luke 1:37, Mark 10:27). There is hope for the bully, the addict, and the one whose mind is stuck in a negative gear. The blamer, the gossiper, the arrogant, and the victim are all offered fresh doses of mercy from God each and every day.
God created those who hurt us. He has a good plan for their lives. He knows the “why” behind their destructive behaviors. He knows the lies they believe about themselves. He knows what stands in the way of their wholeness. He is a Shepherd who pursues every sheep that wanders away from all He offers.
We are temples of God’s Holy Spirit, empowered by Him to believe in what we cannot yet see. We are vessels of His mercy, His wisdom, and His Word. His mighty power is at work within us to accomplish infinitely more than we can ask or imagine (Ephesians 3:20),We do not wrestle against flesh and blood (Ephesians 6:12).
There is a dark force of evil behind every lethal personality disorder and self-defensive coping mechanism. Every casualty in a relationship war has fallen prey to the one who steals, kills, and destroys.
The great news is… God has far more power than Satan. The God of angel armies makes us ready for battle with His truth, salvation, faith, righteousness, peace, and the sword—the Word of God. His banner of victory flies over us. When we arm ourselves and pray, we salute His authority and partner with His plan for the family of God.
What would delight our God more than for us to turn our minds away from the problems and focus on Him? He is our solution.
Praising God is a powerful first line of defense. We can worship and adore Him, our wonderful counselor and supreme relationship expert.
Holy God. You are full of mercy and compassion, slow to anger and full of love. No one can measure Your greatness. You open your hand to satisfy the needs of everyone. You protected Daniel in the lion’s den. You provided an ark before the flood. You create streams in deserts. No situation is too dire for You. Everything is possible because You are the Creator and Redeemer. You love imperfect people extravagantly. Your perfect love drives out fear.
